Mixed Race Supremacy

Alana (17): Mom, I have to marry someone of a different ethnicity so my children will be beautiful. Mom: OK. Alana: But I never wanted to be the white parent because that would be lame.

Simon Says Flagellate

[Samson (10) and Caleb (6) in the backseat of the SUV on a family drive, amusing themselves playing Simon Says. Better said, Caleb amusing himself at Samson's expense.] Caleb: Simon says, “Slap your face very hard.”