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The grocery stores are stocked with brisket for the barbecue and packed with people ready to buy them. Each are boasting the lowest price on chips, soda, and chicken wings to grace the picnic tables of all those anxious for the first, three-day weekend of summer. People are gassing up their boats, packing the camper, and heading for the lake. Some are getting the backyard ready for the big picnic. The neighborhood is coming over and it's all in honor and remembrance of our fallen soldiers who've given their lives and offered themselves a sacrifice in service to our great nation and the defense of liberty everywhere. Time to party.

Where are the memorial services? Where are the relatives of all the brave men and women who paid the ultimate price? Why are so many of their graves unkempt and unvisited? Where's the reverence for those who gave their lives? What's happened to America's observation of Memorial Day?

Unless you're in D.C., or near a national cemetery, it's likely that you'll not see or hear of any community memorial observances. There are a few towns where the traditions still live. Some cemeteries will line their drives with flags. But society in general seems to have forgotten the purpose of this day.

Veterans groups blame the federal government for switching the holiday in 1971, from it's original place on May 30th to the last Monday in May…in order to make it a 3-day weekend. The switch has had the consequence of removing the focus of remembering our fallen soldiers, to having an extended weekend vacation.

Memorial Day used to be observed with parades down the towns' main streets, often ending at a cemetery. The mayor or other city official would read the names of the town's sons and daughters who lost their lives during battle. Speeches were given, prayers were said. A reading of words from a past president or general was given. It was a sacred and solemn occasion. Now, for most it seems, it's nothing more than a chance to relax at the pool and pork out on burgers, hot dogs and baked beans. And I regret that that is the case.

I certainly don't begrudge anyone their picnic at a park, or enjoying time spent with family and friends. I myself will be at a ward picnic that day. But I'll be bringing a memorial display; pictures of my grandparents in their Army uniforms. They were born in Armenia, but came to the United States when their parents were fleeing a genocide of their people. My grandparents joined the U.S. military in their adult years and fought in World War II. I'll also bring pictures of my husband's great uncle, shot at when he parachuted over Normandy on D-day; a picture of my mother's brother who fought in Vietnam; a picture of my father, who was a LTC in the Army, a picture of my Uncle who's currently serving as a Colonel at the Pentagon, and a picture of my own husband, who served in the Air Force during Desert Storm. I'll also have a prayer in my heart for one of my younger brothers, who leaves for Afghanistan in July. Four of them are still alive, but they were and are willing to give all if necessary, and I want to honor that, too.

After the picnic, our family will do as it does every Memorial Day. We'll drive to the grave sites of our family members and place flowers and flags on their resting places, as we'll do the same for the fallen police officers my husband worked with. We'll visit Liberty Memorial, the National World War I Memorial that we're blessed to have in our area. And our home will proudly and thoughtfully fly the flag at half-mast.

Before family prayer, we'll read the words of Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address. We'll remind the kids that even in the past few years 3,437 men and women in the military have given their lives in the current battles of Iraq, and we'll pray for the safe return of those who are still there.

We have a lot of military history on both sides of our family, so we have a special place in our hearts for those who serve. But whether or not a person has such a family history, I hope that somewhere in the fun and relaxation of the day, that the citizens of this country will join us in honoring and remembering those who have given all.

Alison Moore Smith is a 61-year-old entrepreneur who graduated from BYU in 1987. She has been (very happily) married to Samuel M. Smith for 40 years. They are parents of six incredible children and grandparents to two astounding grandsons. She is the author of The 7 Success Habits of Homeschoolers.