The Prophet Said to Plant a Garden. Right.

There's an old Primary song you may have heard…probably depending on the culture where you live. It starts out, “The prophet said to plant a garden, so that's what we'll do…” Now that's a really nice sentiment, but it's easier said than done. Within a year...

The Ethics of Sustainable Gardening

This post brought to you by Scotts Miracle-Gro. All opinions are 100% mine. With the new religion of ecological awareness come many offshoots. In the gardening world the buzzword sustainable gardening. Indeed, I don't know what “non-sustainable gardening”...

Brain Appendages

Monica (15): Mom, are earlobes called earlobes because it has something to do with the brain, or just because they wanted to call them earlobes? Belinda (22): Monica, are nerves called nerves because they get on your nerves? Monica: No, you know, because you have...

Celebrate 43 Years of Earth Day Stupidity

Sam was born in 1959 and I was born in 1964. The generation gap between us is surprisingly enormous. His formative years were spent listing to music whined by long-haired stoners struggling to articulate consonants whilst sliding gently from one pitch to (almost) the...

No More Bugs

I grew up in a home that was bug-free. Apart from the occasional errant spider—which was quickly and unceremoniously extinguished—and a fly or two that escaped the confines of the great outdoors during the frequent ins and outs of a summer barbecue, there wasn't much...