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As I write this, Alana is in the last week of rehearsals for the college premier of Phantom of the Opera at BYU. As with any major-scale production, it's an exciting, challenging, and frustrating process.

One night last week, the seven hour rehearsal included two hours and 45 minutes of standing just offstage waiting for her entrance, just to hear “hold” called, again and again.

While such events are a waste of individual time, they can't be scheduled or predicted (and therefore rarely averted) in the tech rehearsal process. In other words, they are part and parcel of performing in a musical production that has lots special effects.

Nearly 30 years ago, I also performed in BYU's main stage musical production, Rogers' and Hammersteinn's Cinderella. While not nearly as extravagant or expensive, some elements were the same, including elaborate period costumes, full wigs, and a huge ball scene. In fact, the Phantom costumer was also the costumer for Cinderella.

As I hear my daughter's nightly recounting of her hours-long rehearsals, something occurs to me. I had forgotten all these rehearsing difficulties until reminded. I forgot how difficult it was to sit backstage with wooden hip extenders, but I remembered the gorgeous pink and gold brocade of my gown. I forgot how hard it was to breath in a corset, but remembered the fascination with how much trouble dressing was for the women of that time. If forgot how painful it was to have all my red hair  pinned tightly to my head with an enormous blonde wig pinned to it, but I remembered how amazing we all looked, dancing around the ballroom like a fairy tale story.

I also remember how we did all the stage magic and particularly how the audience always oohed and ahed when Cinderella instantaneously transformed from being a dirty, raggedy maid to a princess in a sparkling gown with just the flick of her fairy godmother's wand.

When Jane Luke, the choreographer, put me in the front of the ballroom corp and used me as an example of how to dance and also how to rehearse properly, I felt so honored. I have never forgotten her praise at a time when I was insecure in my performing ability.

Of course, I also remember many funny moments, such as when Aaron, my dance partner, lost his hair piece during a particularly jubilant set of waltz whirling. We had a set where we swooped from the floor up onto the sweeping curved stairway, where we had to freeze in place. As we stopped, his ponytail shifted from teh back of his neck to the side of his head. There we stood, with a blast of white hair sticking straight out of his ear.

One other couple frozen near us could also see the monstrosity. The four of us did our best to remain unmoved and unnoticed, holding carefully in proper closed ballroom position, while shaking with laughter.

As I thought of my very selective memory of those months, it occurred to me that, given what parts really had a lasting impact on me, it would have served me well had I exercised a great deal of patience in the trying moments.

Honestly, I don't remember if I griped and moaned and groaned or not. I don't recall if I complained about every little thing or took it in stride. But I do know that if I did bemoaned the process that always comes with every show, it was a waste of time and energy and didn't serve anyone well.

Patience is the ability to maintain self-control over the impulse that rises suddenly when something disagreeable happens.

This is a lesson I can apply every day of my life. Patience can come with perspective and a sound acknowledgment of what really matters most.

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Alison Moore Smith is a 61-year-old entrepreneur who graduated from BYU in 1987. She has been (very happily) married to Samuel M. Smith for 40 years. They are parents of six incredible children and grandparents to two astounding grandsons. She is the author of The 7 Success Habits of Homeschoolers.